Those of you that have been reading my blog for a while (I love your faces off!) have probably noticed that my posts have progressively been getting a bit more angsty… more sarcastic… more colorful
even. The longer I exist without my husband, the closer I get to impending insanity. This might explain the countless ball jokes
, the stories of pantslessness
, and the overall inappropriateness that is carefully woven in between recipes and my standard post shenanigans. I’d apologize… but I have a feeling that if you’re still reading, you kind of love it.
Laughter is undoubtedly the world’s best medicine and humor has been my deployment self-defense mechanism of choice. So when my blog antics get a little out of hand, I’m simply refilling my prescription. Plus belly laughs double an ab workout. Win-win.
In other news, I started a tally of things that happened while P was gone.
Here are a few of my favorites:
Deployment by Numbers
Number of time I’ve locked myself out of the house 3
Number of times I thanked my husband instead of god for installing the 8th wonder of the world, the remote control garage keypad 3
Number of nights I decided wine and chocolate were an acceptable dinner 2
Number of toes broken 1
Number of obscenities screamed when the aforementioned toe broke 8
Number of times I’ve set off the smoke alarm 10
Number of new batteries I’ve had to put in that damn smoke alarm 3
Number of classes I’ve taken at the gym 130+ [in 8 months]
Number of books read 100+
Number of times I grey hairs I found 6
Number of times I dyed my hair b/c of those stupid silver strands 3
Number of times I watched Despicable Me 25
Number of times I swore I would never make it through this without a straight jacket 20
Number of times I was wrong every. single. time. 🙂
And since we’re doing the numbers thing, thank you x1001
to everyone that left countless comments, tweets, texts, emails, and other forms of encouragement over the past year. You guys are the absolute best support system I could ask for — Love you fiercely! At the risk of making this the cheesiest post ever… “You complete me!”